I'm reproductibly behind

My best church-friend S found out she was expecting her fourth this week. We delivered our 'seconds' three days apart, and she's since had another. I found out tonight another friend at church is expecting her fourth. Another friend just delivered her fourth a couple months ago- we carried our 'seconds' together, too. Her dd was born the same day as S's ds was, three days before Hannah.

I was pregnant with Penny and Joy, too. Joy delivering Noel exactly one month before I had Hannah. Y'all have since had one more and are expecting your fourth! I'm drinking the water people! Wassup? lol

I know both times I conceived it was after a massive weight loss. I have 35-40 lbs to lose, I am wondering if this isn't built in birth control or something, because, well, we don't use BC! I want to lose this weight but should I expect another child to come with the loss? Do I want another child to come with the loss? I want the loss ... am I looking around thinking I want the child too?

I know the Lord has a plan for us. I found that house, there's definitely a working plan there. I start college this week. I've decided this will be my "big" Mary Kay year which will be hard work. It's really hard to see getting pregnant with all this going on, but it still feels a little .... weird? not being in on all the expecting club happenings.

My youngest just turned four. If I got pregnant NOW, she would be turning 5 when the baby was born. Am I prepared for a bigger age gap? kwim? Does any of this make sense?